Therapy can feel like a mysterious or even intimidating concept if you’ve never experienced it before. Many people have heard things about therapy that might put them off from considering to give therapy a try. For example, some think therapy is only for people with serious problems, or that it’s just like chatting with a friend. In fact, this is often what stops us from being able to get the right support from our own life challenges and setbacks. Here I will breakdown five common myths about therapy, and talk about what therapy really is all about.
Myth 1: “Practitioners/psychologists are all biased professionals who always advocate ‘therapy is the best support.’ They must always convince me to take part in therapy, as long as I pay.”
Answer 1: Practicing psychologists, counselors and therapists work under strict adherence to ethical guidelines. Whether you decide on taking formal/paid sessions with them or not, they support in different ways to help you find out what works best for you in terms of support, whether that involves therapy or exploring other resources which improve your well-being. You can find out those support via their free consultations, free resource blogs (like the one you are reading now!), or enquiry platforms such as chatbox or emails.
Therapy brings a positive influence in people’s lives, but it is also an optional, and not the only choice. Therapy benefits everyone, but there are also many factors which affect your ability to benefit from it – e.g. the right therapist, budget, the own motivation.
A good therapist or psychologist will not pressure you into therapy for financial gain - they are here to provide genuine support. Whether you decide on taking therapy with a professional or not, he/she should respect your choices and decisions. The therapy you decide on should well align with your needs and goals.
Myth 2: I will know what to do after having a session with the practitioner. She/he will tell me what the problem is and how to fix it.
Answer 2: Therapy is not about a therapist telling you what is wrong, and how to fix it. You are supported by the therapist/psychologist who guides you through self-discovery. Their role is to ask questions and offer insights to help you reflect on your own situations and difficulties. You grow to become the expert of navigating your own life, addressing life challenges meaningfully and effectively.
In reality, a problem is not gone, disappeared or fixed after an hour of session. It is also commonly normal, at times, if you still feel confused and a lack of progress after the first few sessions. You need not be disheartened if you still feel confused or lost after starting therapy.
Take cooking as an example. We may hold a chef's secret recipe, but a recipe does not indicate we can COOK well. At the beginning we may not even manage the basic things well - like holding a knife, or identifying the ingredients accurately. We may feel very overwhelmed and think we will never be able to cook at all.
The recipe is not the problem. It is just that we are not yet equipped with the skills or experiences to do everything related to cooking all-at-once, let alone feeling confident to have our 'own say' about how to best cooking the food.
It takes time before we enhance our skills and experience. Then we begin to experiment changing or adding new spices or ingredients. Some changes work, some don’t. But gradually we develop our own best recipe.
Therapy is more than a recipe. It is both the recipe and that cooking training, to help you develop the skills, insights and experiences for you towards mastery.
Myth 3: Practitioners are all experts in their work. I may not be comfortable with my working therapist/psychologist so far, but I will still see her/him anyways and see how things go.
Answer 3: Many people overlook the importance of a good therapeutic fit between a client and the working therapist. You have the right to find a good therapist just for you. In fact, therapy research has long suggested that a big key to the success of a therapy depends on a strong and trusting relationship between the client and the own therapist/psychologist.
Finding a right fit takes time. A good practitioner should have the right practice experiences to work with you to collaboratively bring out your growth. Find the practitioners who have relevant work experiences on dealing with your issues (You can check out another article I have written on, regarding how to find the right therapist/practitioner).
It is normal you do not feel completely comfortable with the working practitioner rightaway. Therapy is a process. However, if you are not feeling comfortable with your therapist, it is important you can communicate this. At times this can also be an empowering process for the therapist/psychologist to discuss with you your concerns, and to work out how to improve. You may also explore other options. Your therapist/psychologist should be open to help you find someone who can be a better match for you.
Whatever it is, you should be able to feel listened to, understood and supported.
Myth 4: This practitioner charges a lot. I am not sure how long this therapy will last but I will just pay a few sessions first. It will work out later.
Answer 4: You do need to consider your practical aspects of therapy. Budget and affordability is often an overlooked yet a key towards success of your overall treatment. In fact, therapy does involve an moderate investment. Nonetheless, a successful therapy should include a right approach to your growth, matching your specific needs, and work in a pace which works best for you.
In real practice, how long a therapy lasts depends on the nature of your issues. Short term therapies may last for 6-12 sessions and may be better supported by structured or solution focused therapies. Long term therapies focus on the more deep-rooted issues or the more severe mental health challenges, or difficulties and trauma caused by the severe life adversities. This can last up to 1-3 years.
Don’t forget you can always ask your practitioner openly about concerns regarding cost, and how to support you to better afford your sessions without financial stress. You are welcome to explore with the practitioner any discount option or sliding scale fees to help you have an idea on how therapy may/can fit into your budget.
Therapy can be a valuable investment in your life, but also it is true you ought to approach it in a way which is with consideration regarding the costs involved and being clear about their practicalities.
Myth 5: I need to find the perfect practitioner for myself. Then I should stick with that person and have no further problems.
Answer 5: Therapy seeking involves setting expectations about therapy and the therapeutic relationship. Finding a right fit takes time, and even a good fit initially does not mean the person will be the beste fit forever.
If you look for therapy for the first time, don’t feel obligated to ‘stick with’ the first therapist you pick. Certainly you could go for that therapist if you feel right with her/him, but if not, it is completely reasonable you go to find another therapist/practitioner, until you realize it is a match.
Take some time to utilize the free consultation opportunities for you to learn more about the practitioners and their offering therapy, or even just the idea of therapy. Many practitioners in fact offer free 15-20 minutes of consultation. Such short conversation will provide with a space for you to get a sense of the practitioner’s communication style, personality and work experiences. In fact, you can do it with me via booking here.
As therapy progresses, it is okay and beneficial you reassess your needs with your therapist. This helps you keep track of the progress of your growth, and if there is any point which indicates that you may want to consider another therapist as more suitable for you.
The goal of having good therapy is that you always find the support which works best for you at any time, even including a change of your therapist/psychologist. It is completely natural that at times, you may need a change and this means change of support around you.
Conclusion
Therapy is not about solving problems or following a specific professional or work approach. Certainly a therapist/psychologist is not to pressure you to doing work which you do not feel clear about.
Therapy is a personalized journey which tailors to your own needs and goals. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, though you can find the right practitioner who can guide you to find out ways and strategies that work for you to navigate life's challenges. We hope that this article helps you become more open and positive in thinking about therapy.
Comments